I haven't failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work

One day Thomas Edison came home and gave a paper to his mother. He told her, "My teacher gave me this paper and told me to only give it to my mother."

His mother's eyes were tearful as she read the letter out loud to her child: Your sin is a genius. This school is too small for him and doesn't have enough good teachers for training him. Please teach him yourself.

After many, many years, after Edison's mother died and he was one of the greatest investors of the century, one day he was looking through old family things. Suddenly he saw a folded paper in the corner of a drawer in a desk. He took it and opened it up.

On the paper was written: Your son is addled (mentally ill). We won't let him come to school anymore.

Edison cried for hours and then he wrote in his diary: "Thomas Alva Edison was an addled child that, by her mother, became the genius of the century."


Moral: Never give up. Be confident

Women Will Always Win, Great Story

After 37 years of marriage, Jake dumped his wife for his young secretary.

His new girlfriend demanded that they live in Jake and Edith's multi-million dollar home. Since Jake had better lawyers, he prevailed. He gave Edith, his now ex-wife, just 3 days to move out.

She spent the 1st day packing her belongings into boxes and crates.

On the second day, she had two movers come and collect her things.

On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp shells dipped in caviar into the hollow of all the curtain rods. She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.

When Jake returned with his new girlfriend, all was a bliss for the first few days.

Then slowly, the house began to smell. They tried everything- cleaning, mopping, and airing the place out. Vents were checked for dead rodents and carpets were cleaned. Air fresheners wee brought in to set off gas canisters during which they had to move out for a few days and in the end they even replaced the expensive wool carpeting. Nothing worked.

People stopped coming over to visit. Repairman refused to work in the house. The maid quit.

Finally, they could not take the stench and longer and decided to move.

A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out and eventually even the realtors refused to return their calls. Finally they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new home.

Edith called Jake and asked how things were going. He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely and said that she missed her old home terribly and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in the exchange for getting the house back.

Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on a price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth, but only if she were to sign the papers that very day. She agreed and within the hour, his lawyers delivered the paperwork.

A week later, Jake and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home....


Including the curtain rods.


From: postsforall.com

She thought it was a good idea to sunbathe on the hotel roof. But never saw this coming

A rather well-proportioned secretary, Joan, wanted to spend almost all of her vacation sunbathing on the roof of the hotel.

She wore a bathing suit the first day but, on the second, she decided that no one could see her way up there, and she slipped out of it for an overall tan.

She'd hardly begun when she heard someone running up the stairs; she was lying on her stomach, so she just pulled a towel over her rear. "Excuse me, miss," said the flustered little assistant manager of the hotel, out of breath from running up the stairs.

"The Hilton doesn't mind you sunbathing on the roof but we would very much appreciate you wearing a bathing suit as you did yesterday."

"What difference does it make?" Joan asked rather calmly.

"No one can see me up here, and besides, I'm covered with a towel." "Not exactly," said the embarrassed little man. "You're laying on the dining room skylight."

She thought she saw her husband cheating, but the reality was even worse

Learn to trust your husband...

There comes a time when a woman just has to trust her husband, for example...

A wife comes home late at night from being out of town and quietly opens the door to her bedroom. From under the blanket she sees four legs instead of two. She reaches for a baseball bat and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can.

Once she's done, she goes to the kitchen to have a drink. As she enters, she sees her husband there, reading a magazine.

"Hi Darling," he says, "Your parents have come to visit us, so I let them stay in our bedroom. Did you say, "Hello" to them?

Waiting for the right time

As the day goes on, USD/JPY remains stuck below 120.400. I have been waiting for the right time to enter my position but the movement is very unpredictable. Any forex traders have opinions about what to do? Buy or Sell, at the moment I am searching for a conclusion.

A Student Tries To Convince His Teacher To Give Him A Better Grade. The Final Attempt Is Priceless

A student goes to talk to his professor about the grade on his exam. He walks up says, "What is this? Why did you give me an 80?"

The professor looks at the exam again, "Yep, an 80 is what you deserve."

The student takes the exam back and asks, "If I bite my own eye, will you give me an 85?"

The professor is surprised, but still he agrees, at which point the student then takes out his glass eye and bites it.

The shocked professor then takes the exam back, and marks it 85.

The student then says, "If I bite my nose, will you give me a 90?"

The professor is once again shocked. "He can't pull out his own nose" he thinks to himself. He finally agrees, at which point the student takes out his dentures, and bites his own nose.

The professor once again takes the exam, and makes the grade 90.

The student then makes another offer.

"If I get up on this table, and pee the perfume of Coco Chanel on you, will you give me a 100?"

The professor now has to see what this kid can do, so he agrees. The student goes on the table, and pees all over the professor. The professor's shirt is soaking wet, as he goes to sniff it.

"What the heck?! This isn't Coco Chanel! This is pee!"

The student replies, "Fine, we'll leave it at 90."

The Monkey

A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while he's drinking, the monkey jumps all around the place. The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them. Then grabs some sliced limes and eats them. Then umps onto the pool table, grabs one of the billiard balls, sticks it in his mouth, and to everyone's amazement, somehow swallows it whole.
The bartender screams at the guy, "Did you see what your monkey just did?"
The guy says, "No, what?" "He just ate the cue ball off my pool table-whole!"
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy. "He eats everything in sight, the little bastard. Sorry. I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff." He finishes his drink, pays his bill, pays for the stuff the monkey ate, then leaves.

Two weeks later he's in the bar again, and has his money with him. He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again. While the man is finishing his drink, the monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it in his but, pulls it out, and eats it. The bartender is disgusted.
"Did you see what your monkey did now?" he asks.
"No, what?" replies the guy. "Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry up his butt, pulled it out, and ate it!" said the bartender.
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy. "He still eats everything in sight, but ever since he swallowed that cue ball, he measures everything first..."